Random Ramble

It's the last day of 2009. Time to reflect. It's been a great year in so many ways. Right this moment one of my favorite things in the world, Maya, is cuddling and licking me. Ouch! She just bit me too! Work is a huge part of my life and this year has been tiring but amazing. I'm part of a revolution in education, truly on the ground floor and it feels good. Aww crap, I don't want to reflect anymore. Not in the mood. I'm going to see "New Moon" with a friend this afternoon. I know it's crap, but we saw "Twilight" together and promised to see this one together, besides our husbands won't go see it! Here's the problem with blogs as opposed to diaries. Everyone can read them. I can't complain about things that I don't want people to read, because technically they could. A retired teacher from FUHS does tarot card readings and I'm getting one tomorrow. I hope it says something interesting. I got paid today I should be more excited. But since it's all gone already as usual it doesn't really excite me. I don't feel sick anymore. I'm still taking freaking antibiotics though. Damn, I must be getting old because they have really wrecked me. I have all sorts of digestive issues from them and headaches, etc. Ah well, only one more day. At least my sinus infection is gone. This isn't really the stuff of blogs is it? Oh well, if I'm going to write consistently this is some of what it's going to look like. I do love to write. Do other people read the stuff they've written over and over? I read my stuff all the time. It's sort of weirdly narcissistic. We are a culture of narcissists though aren't we? Facebook and Twitter validate that. I got a Wii for Christmas and it's actually pretty freaking fun. I need to watch less TV. It's such a time suck. But it is what I do to relax I guess. I need to clean my office. Shit, I've been saying that for at least a year. Maybe that should be my goal for today. Ya know what? It is. I'm going to do it! That would make me feel very accomplished. Okay, oh and I hate the title of my blog too. Very, ummm, arrogant?

Don't Talk and Drive!

So I know that a lot of us talk on the cell phone or goddess forbid, text while driving. You won't after you see this. It's hard to watch, I'll warn you. As a high school teacher I have seen too many young people die because of avoidable things. Watch this. Pay attention when you're driving! Please?!

Watch this!

Resolutions

Last time I attempted to clean out my office, something I am thinking of doing today; at least now while I lie in bed, I found a diary from when I was a teenager. The first line was something about how I was going to write every day, stop smoking, stop drinking, stop getting high, stop eating junk food and start exercising. Ha! Way to load it on huh? As I look to the start of a new year I try to think of what I have accomplished as opposed to what I need to change. One thing for sure, I didn't work as much this year. I quit my second job and only worked as a teacher. Oh and some research work, but that is all informing my practice as a teacher. I lost twenty two pounds, although I haven't weighed myself lately. :) In May I will have quit smoking for three years and this month I have been sober for, shit, I don't actually know. HA. I was drunk for the beginning of 2000 so I would have to say it was December of that year. So, nine years. I have done better with money this year. We are paying off our debt and I'm working to get to the place where I have spending money again. So what to resolve for two thousand ten? You're looking at one. Write in or on? Beth, what's the proper preposition? Whichever, post to my blog more often. Stay in better touch with friends. Not work too much. Continue to take better care of myself. Go to the midwest to see my sister, and Tim's kids and grandkids. Get new living room furniture. Get a cleaning person again! Start a fund for my cat rescue. Encourage Tim to take better care of himself whatever that entails. Cook more. That sounds like enough for now. What about you? By the way, the picture is of me and my niece's grandma at Thanksgiving. Only one I had on my laptop so ...

It's a new day...

What a difference a day makes.  This is the reason you should write things down daily, so you can follow your moods and see that it doesn't stay "that" way forever.  It was another beautiful Hum. Co. day.  Probably got up to about sixty five? Beautiful.  I only worked at school, no online grading, a huge relief.  I will have a few more weekends in May but then I'm off pretty much all summer!  I left school soon enough that I had time to putter around the house, cook dinner and can now relax. Of course, I should be grading papers, but I most likely won't get those done until this weekend so why stress??  My working all the time hasn't quite been fair to my students either because I can't get everything corrected the way I like to.  I love summer.  It's so amazing here, the sun doesn't go down until eight or nine and even though it's never hot like it is down south, it is amazing.  I am also not feeling sick anymore and I think I might even ride the bus tomorrow!  That always makes me feel better, even when it's a nasty day so if it's nice again, imagine how much fun I'll have!  Okay well I'm gonna go hang with my husband and the cats then probably read Wicked, which is amazing so far.  It's quite sexual and political, which surprised me, especially since the person that loaned it to me is a twelve yr old, Christian girl.  Who woulda thunk it?  Thanks for reading Bethy!  :)

Woe is me

I am sick of it.  Sick of doing everything for everyone else and never enjoying a freaking thing!  Whose fault is it? Mine of course.  I dunno.  I haven't had a weekend off in forever, finally get one and I 'm sick.  So I sleep all weekend, feel better and now all the shit that I should have gotten done on the weekend needs to get done.  I have a million papers to grade.  I still don't feel all that great and it's beautiful outside and i don't care.  My reaction is to just crawl under a rock.  That's always been my solution I guess.  Nothing gets done that way though and it's just worse when you finally get out from under the rock.  But it's not like I don't work hard.  I do.  Too hard.  Too much.  I don't know how to ask for help.  I don't like to assert my needs.  I am a mess.  I'm working on it, but today it feels like it just doesn't matter.  A never ending pile of things to do, and I take on more.  It also seems like everyone around me doesn't have that much to do.  Not because they are lazy but because they say no, or don't take on more or make room for their lives.  AAAAHHHH.  I have to work now... 

Will the real Freddy Krueger please stand up?

My sister, she made up FreddyK, a long time before whoever takes credit for him now.  Really.  She used to tell me stories, that she made up, about a character who had an ashy face, wore a hat, and would kill people by slicing them up with his one really long fingernail.  There was also something about him storing those cut up bodies in wine barrels for wine and cheese parties.  That part was a by-product of all the wine and cheese parties my  mom had in the 70's, which is when my sister was telling these stories.  Yeah.  Way before this Freddy guy.  Lawsuit anyone?  I will testify.  So will my bff Michele, cause I told her the stories too.  I don't remember if I lied and told her I made them up, but that doesn't matter now.  I finished that book I was reading.  I need to read it again.  That's all I am willing to say about it now.  

My addiction

Have you ever read a book and craved it during the day?  While you're reading it of course.  It happens to me all the time.  For instance, my dear sibling sent me a YA Lit book called Cruddy.  I have at least fifteen books in queue to read, but I started that puppy and couldn't put it down.  All day long today, I just wanted to read.  Not grade papers.  Not talk to students.  But I resisted and was excited as hell when I had to wait for a prescription so I could read.  HA!  Slightly pathetic.  So I just got off the phone with my mom and we talked about the usual, her doctors appt, cats, my husband, etc. Then, guess what we talked about?  Books!  Wow.  How diverse my life is.  Gonna go read...

Time

Moves so much more quickly as you get older.  It's one  of those things older people tell you and you just shrug it off, but damn it is true!  I guess I am an older person telling you now.  You, whoever you are.  My sister I guess.  I love to type.  I love to write.  It seems rather inconvenient to write a blog every day though. I wonder why?  The pressure to perform.  That's a crock.  What should I tell you?  I went to breakfast with a friend today and had eggs benedict.  With real hollandaise sauce.  MMMM.  Great coffee.  I love Gmail.  Maybe I had too much coffee today?  I need to clean my office.  We gave the cats, we have four, flea stuff today and they are all passed out now.  Which is pretty much par for the course because they are cats.  Speaking of cats, I have been dreaming about what I will do if and when I retire from teaching.  I want to have a cat sanctuary and I found a great one on the web.  I will try and post it here.  

http://www.cathouseonthekings.com/index.php

Check it out.  That's me in about ten years or so.  Although at the rate time is going...

How can I not?

Talk about students?  School?  That is who I am.  That is what I do.  Today was a great day, but I had a run in with some students.  What happened isn't important, but I felt bad.  I was questioning what I had done in the situation, what I should have done to handle it differently.  Whether or not I was still a good teacher.  Yeah, I know, quite a jump but that's what I do.  Then I talk to my partner about it and feel a little better.  Later, I am posting back and forth with ex-students, and current students and they post about what a great teacher I am!  It totally made my night.  ALSO, a student who is currently in my previous school and one I feel I mentored, is on the verge of being accepted into an elite Ivy League school.  It's not even important that she gets in, it's that she got that far, and learned to believe in herself enough to do it.  What better job could there ever be?

So my sister who is blogging at innocentdonuts.blogspot.com has a new obsession with photographing "abandoned seating".  I had a student who is a great photographer and he took this picture so I thought I would share it with everyone.  All my millions of readers! The photographer is Eli Rohl by the way.  

Purpose

There are so many times a day I think "I need to write that down".  But do I?  No.  Hence this blog. I can't really say what it will be about.  As a high school teacher it would be unprofessional to talk about work.  It would also be frowned upon to talk about my social life.  Basically, anything I write could and might be viewed by anyone.  Limiting?  Dunno.  I could invite people to view my blog, but that seems rather...something.  Who would possibly read this?  Anyone?  No one?  My mom? Ahhh well, it will either be another piece of flotsam I created and didn't follow through with floating in cyberspace, or I will actually keep up.  Guess you'll have to wait and see...